March 28, 2023

The real face of the student, what should you do, when I went to swim in the river in the afternoon, I instantly understood why he was still in the water, a child who can’t swim can’t afford to be hurt, etc. 25 funny jokes about swimming .

1. My friend Xiao Zhang is a swimming coach. A few days ago, his family introduced a pretty girl to him, but he refused to do so. It was only later that he found out that the girl was his original student, and he knew the true face of that student!

2. Ask: “If your rival fell into the river, he can’t swim, but you can, what should you do?”

God replied: “All living beings are equal. You can’t let others despair when they need you most because of your own prejudice. Life is precious. Everyone has their own world. Even a rival in love has parents, relatives and friends. You can’t be selfish. So, I would jump in the water regardless of my own risk, swim in front of him, and let him watch and learn.”

3. When I went swimming in the river in the afternoon, I found a foreigner who was very unhygienic. That guy had been drinking the river water. How dirty the river water was. He was still drinking happily, dancing and yelling, and asking others “Drink (help)? Drink (help)?”.

Later, maybe he found that I looked at him with unfriendly eyes, so he sank into the water and drank it, and didn’t come up for a long time.

4. When I was in high school, my classmates took me to the swimming pool to teach me how to swim. My classmates said that I learned fast in the deep water area. The host jumped from the deep water area without even thinking about it. , the lifeguard jumped down and lifted me up, and I rested on the shore for a long time…, I found the lifeguard gesticulating at me in the water, I looked at the swimming trunks in my hand, and instantly understood why he was still soaking in the water inside…

5. When I first learned to swim, I was very nervous when I was swimming, and I couldn’t bear to be frightened.

Once when I was swimming, a diving enthusiast suddenly swam under me, and I was frightened.

I wanted to stand up, but I stepped on that buddy, and found a lot of air bubbles coming out of the water.

He didn’t step on it once, and hit the buddy heavily again.

And then…the dude came to the surface and said: Dude, are you trying to sink me?

6. Sun Honglei started playing in Mayday, and it also rained a little in summer, and Nicholas Tse also blew up, which made Cecilia Cheung unable to go swimming in Stephen Chow.

7. In the midsummer of this year, I ate skewers with a few friends, and somehow talked about ghost movies in Hong Kong. The original topic was quite easy, but after two of them told me their personal experiences, goosebumps crawled all over their bodies: two close friends, Azhi and Pengpeng, graduated from a vocational high school in Nancheng, Beijing. Assigned to a newly built five-star hotel in Nancheng – “Grand X Garden Hotel” to open up wasteland, do the final cleaning work, and prepare to welcome the first batch of guests. Some of the classmates went to the room department, and some went to the front office department. And Azhi and Pengpeng were assigned to the banquet department because of their tough appearance. Students who have just graduated are like a machine with a string on it, and they still enjoy being manipulated by others. I had already finished the middle shift, but was stopped by the director of the Recreation Department: “Both of you don’t leave, help us clean up the bottom of the swimming pool, and we can store water tomorrow morning.” Helpless, Azhi, Pengpeng and three other classmates cleaned up the bottom of the swimming pool thoroughly. …

8. When I was young, I watched tunnel warfare , and I admired the scenes of digging tunnels to fight devils. So we discussed with the fourth uncle’s son that we also dig a trap to catch the thief. He dug a 1-meter-deep pit on a small road behind his house, poured mud and water into it, and poured a bucket of dung from his house into it, and put a few sticks on it. Small bamboo pieces, and then covered with leaves, went into the grove to play. In the evening, my friends were about to go home to swim in the reservoir, and saw my fourth uncle covered in feces, cursing as he walked, who the hell dug a hole behind my house, and even pooed shit, so I caught Fei and pooed him skin…

9. When I went to learn swimming, Ping Ping was very stupid. I couldn’t teach him no matter what. In the end the coach got really angry and scolded, “I really don’t know how you swam to the uterus.” Weakly said, “At that time, it was also for survival, and I didn’t think so much…”

10. The admin is talking to a cutie: “Sorry, we don’t allow swimming here.” “Then why didn’t you tell me before I undress?” “We don’t ban undressing.”

11. That night I went swimming in Dadonghai with a few friends, all men.

Walking on the beach, there are couples kissing everywhere, I feel strange.

At this time, he walked to a couple, and suddenly one friend turned to the other friend’s face.

Pretend to kiss too… The scene was messy, the couple was scared, we laughed until our stomach hurts and continued to swagger away.

12. A certain gentleman always likes to throw the cigarette butt on the ground after smoking, and then stamps out the cigarette butt with his feet. The couple went swimming that day, and he smoked on the shore. After a while, I heard a scream, and my wife looked up, and it turned out that he was stepping on cigarette butts without shoes.

13. The thief stole a chicken and plucked it by the river.

The pol-ice passed by, the thief hurriedly threw the chicken into the river, and explained to the pol-ice: This chicken is swimming, I will help it look at the clothes!

14. Son: Mom, the aunt next door can swim very well, why can’t you?

Mom: Because the aunt next door likes to eat fish, so she can swim! Mom doesn’t like to eat fish, how can she swim.

Son: But, mom, you like chicken so much, why haven’t you seen you lay eggs before? !

15. Patrolman: Fishing is not allowed here. Fisherman: I am not fishing, I am teaching earthworms to practice swimming. Patrolman: Then, show me the earthworm. Fisherman: Look! Patrolman: Naked swimming is not allowed, you should be fined.

16. Have you ever played the game of “Water Float”? It is by the river, throw flat stones vigorously, and let the stone flakes rub the water and fly.

My friends and I have always loved to play, and we can hit more than a dozen if we play well!

I didn’t play very well today, I only played six or seven.

It may be that there are not too many people swimming in the river today, so it is not easy to hit.

17. <Welcome to Beijing>: My umbrella is often opened, and the umbrella is opened to keep out the rain. It is not uncommon for Wuhan to have a sea, and fish are raised everywhere in Beijing. My family lives in a sea-view room, and there are islands outside the window. One place and two places are not a problem, as the whole city is surrounded by water. Beijing welcomes you, drenching you with heavy rain, and the subway in the waterfall is full of vitality. Beijing welcomes you. Anyone who can swim is amazing. It is a miracle to get home smoothly…

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